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Saturday 27 April 2013

Reflective Journal Wrting: My professional journal




 For the reader's notice; that this post is shared from one of my assignments submitted for Master of Nursing Science course. Everybody is welcome to give comment, please.


1.      Introduction
Reflective journal writing is a teaching learning strategy within which the responsibility for the student’s learning is shared by both educators and students. Reflective journal writing enhances the use of self-analysis and critical thinking; reinforce the important of utilizing theory to guide nursing practice (Riley-Doucet & Wilson 1997). Reflective journal writing provides an additional emphasis on the self to promote self-awareness and self evaluation which is important for personal and professional development. Riley-Doucet & Wilson, 1997 also recommended that implementation of innovative educational approach to self-reflection is recommended for beginning nursing student, and can be applied in any clinical setting to promote self-directed learning.
 Reflective journal writing provides the private and confidential environment in which students and staff are free to examine and reflect on their work with patients thoroughly and honestly without fear of judgment and reprisal. Many experts identified that such kind of safe learning environment is essential to learning the skill of self-reflection, facilitating improvement in clinical practice.
As a reflective learner in advanced nursing education, self-determination theory, initially developed by Edward L. Deci and Richard M. Ryan, is used as a framework for writing my professional journal. It is a macro-theory of human motivation, personality development, and well being, which suggests that people function effectively and experience greater mental health when their behavior is autonomous rather than controlled (Ryan 2009). The central assumption of self-determination theory is that the individual is born with basic psychological needs required for autonomy, relatedness and competence.

2.      Life Experience in nursing profession
Nursing, provision of care to the people, is an honorable career but it is challenging. I have been in nursing field for one and half decade. My life as a nurse is not much rewarding because of my personal life events, financial restraint and government policy. Struggling with these restrictions and difficulties, I have never given up developing myself. As it has been assumed by self-determination theory, people are active organism with inherent and deeply evolved tendencies toward psychological growth and development, and this active nature is clearly evident in the phenomena of intrinsic motivation (Ryan 2009). I believe, likewise, that I have innate nature of developing self, and helping development of others. This innate nature has been driving me to endure pains and obstacles in life.
According to self-determination theory, condition supporting the individual experience of autonomy, competence, and relatedness are urges to foster the most volitional and high quality forms of motivation and engagement for activities including enhanced performance, persistence, and creativity. Rarely the nurses in Myanmar including myself obtain as such supportive condition which facilitates internal motivation to personal and professional development. Consequently, satisfactory quality of nursing services is not deliberately contributed, and the patients and community members are not receiving excellent health care as well as optimal health and well being.

2.1. Preparation stage: being a student nurse and challenges
I started four years Bachelor of Nursing Science course in 1996 and graduated in year 2000. I had been exciting to learn biomedical and nursing subjects at the beginning. We had been taught many nursing theories and models which were very new to us. After learning these theories only, I understood what is nursing, and the professional attributes. Supportively, we had to learn behavioral sciences including psychology, sociology and communication skills.
The learning environment within university campus was a healthy climate for us facilitating conducive learning experiences, and acquiring positive attitudes toward the clients, the community and the professional image. In clinical setting, however, it was an extremely frustrating and depressing experience. Since degree program in nursing had established in Myanmar just a few years before I joined, we were facing negative and unsupportive reactions from medical doctors.  Medical doctors are, even until now, holding stereotyped value on nurses just as efficient assistants for them, and they want to maintain that traditional role of nurses as the obedient followers or helpers for the doctors. They discouraged and devalued nursing students who were doing degree program. Some doctors openly expressed that nurses were not necessary to have a degree to provide nursing care. When they noticed bachelor of nursing students were conducting research, they commented that was not the nurses’ job.
Unfavorably, strong negative comments of the doctors influenced some of the senior nurses and ward sisters that their traditional diseased-oriented and task-oriented training was perfect. Yet those seniors and ward sisters were skillful in clinical procedures, and their performances were highly credited by the doctors, but their practices were not client-centered nursing care. Since the dominating nursing practice was task-oriented, there had no reflective practice and critical thinking on improvement of nursing care standard. Honestly, we could not overcome their resistances to change the old tradition to the new outlook. Hardly nursing professors and lectures from the university were unable to influence the practicing nurses in clinical setting.
Therefore, we did not get complete social and cultural conditions which promote our volitional and self-determined behavior. This made us lack of confidence to change the trend of nursing practice. Thank to the nursing and complementary subjects I had learned and positive reinforcement of my devoted lecturers, positive attitudes toward nursing professional and my innate nature of developing self was still maintained.
2.2. Working experience and challenges in home country
I worked as a staff nurse in private medical center after graduated, which was an exciting experience as a novice nurse. Since it was in my 23, I was completely fresh and active physically and mentally. I was eager to learn everything, and my seniors were supportively guided me in dealing with patients’ care and performing therapeutic procedures. I was happy with the favorable condition giving some form of autonomy, and safe working environments, where supervision and proper guidance were always carried out by ward sisters and the matron. It was because there were increasing numbers of nurses graduated with updated nursing curricula, and the sisters and matron also were aware the current trend at the time.
Although I enjoyed being a clinical staff, I preferred to be a nurse educator. For this reason, I accepted the offer from government, Department of Medical Science, Ministry of Health, as a nursing instructor at the new Nursing Training School (NTS). In Myanmar, the job descriptions for nursing instructors include delivering lecture and clinical teaching. I taught Fundamentals of Nursing, and Medical and Surgical Nursing. There were so many tasks to do other than classroom teaching and supervision of the students in clinical setting. Since it was a new NTS, there were only 20 students in the first intake, and three educators; the principal, a tutor and myself as an instructor. 
Truly it was happened that the government started to open new NTS without having the building, skill lab, essential equipment and facilities. Therefore, government general hospital had to share one the small ward as the building of NTS. The principal borrowed a bed from the hospital to demonstrate basic nursing procedures. As a nature of bureaucratic government system, they slowly provided the required equipment and supplies. Since there was no office staff at the beginning, I did the entire clerical task under guidance of the principal. I was satisfied with my teaching job, and I love my students. However, on the other hand, it was very disappointing for not having enough facilities. I had learnt that these conditions hindered my students’ ability to prepare themselves as highly competent and confident nurses. We had tried our best within our ability, no matter how the condition was unfavorable, in order to produce the graduated nurses with some level of confidence and competency. The resulted outcome was fairly satisfactory that we received positive feedback on our first intake of graduated nurses.
According to self-determination theory, Ryan (2009) claimed that although the natural growth tendencies underlying intrinsic motivation are evolved, this does not imply that they operate robustly under all conditions. He proposed that these inherent tendencies require specific supports and nutriments from one’s social environment that are essential for psychological growth, integrity, and wellness. I feel that statement is totally true for me and my students. We have internal motivation, which needs supportive environment and satisfaction to promote our capabilities and potential leadership abilities. Unfortunately, we did not receive enough support and resources, losing some potential and contributive efforts to the society. If the organizational policy changes to provide equal opportunity and facilities for nursing education, as it is providing to the medical education, nursing students will be well-prepared to become highly qualified nurses. The same idea should be applied in working environment, otherwise, job satisfaction is not met and deficient in providing quality nursing care. Ryan (2009) also supported that thwarting or frustration of the basic psychological needs; autonomy, relatedness and competence, leads to diminished self-motivation and greater ill-being.
Since I did not have enriched experience to overcome these unsupportive and suppressive conditions, I have suffered from lack of confidence to move forward and deficient in creativity for more effective teaching learning strategy. Moreover, the government even could not provide enough salary for us to cover daily expenses. This leads to increase staff turnover and migrating to foreign countries. I finally decided to resign from government service and migrated to work in Malaysia.

2.3. Working experience  and challenges in Malaysia
I worked as a staff nurse at Mawar Haemodialysis Center, Seremban for two years. It had been some exciting experiences as well as challenging situations. At the beginning, it was exciting to learn heamodialysis (HD) procedures. At the same time, I had to deal with some cultural conflicts and language barrier with the patients who do not understand English. I had learned Bahasa Malaysia, to be able to communicate with all patients and improve interpersonal relationship which is important to get rapport in providing care and HD management. I was well-adapted and settled in new situation within six months periods, and my work performance was well-recognized. It could be considered that I had received satisfactory working condition with minimal distractions.
Chief nursing officer was admirably powerful and very straightforward that she could influence all staffs including non-nursing personals. I learned from her that she was very disciplined, and she herself strictly followed the disciplines she set up. She had full confidence in administration the whole center with many branches, and I think that confidence came from her devoted years of experiences in nursing, autonomy and authority she had acquired. I felt that she has achieved successful career life fulfilled with basic psychological needs mainly autonomy and satisfaction.  She has, therefore, been highly contributive to the entire haemodialysis center with expert knowledge, supportive supervision and effective leadership role model. She totally influenced us to be obedient with rules and regulations as well as the essential principles of nursing practice regarding management of patients undergoing HD.
Working as a foreign staff, continuous professional development had not been taken into account for us, and we did not get the opportunity to attend any workshop or seminar conducted by other organizations in Malaysia. Continuous learning opportunity, which I believed as a major nutriment for my life-long career development, has been the main area of interest for me. Although I received safe and healthy working condition, I was not satisfied with lack of staff development concern for non-local staff. After completing two years employment contract, I accepted the offer from UCSI University.
Working at UCSI University under School of Nursing has been another challenging experience for me. There, I was a clinical instructor as well as the in-charge for nursing clinical skill unit. My job descriptions were supervision of students in skill unit and clinical posting, coordinating the timetable and schedules for lecture demonstration and supervised practice, inventory control, and purchasing equipments and consumables. Since my area of interest is teaching and educating, I was happy with my students, supervising their practices, giving instructions and corrective actions, providing positive attitudes toward nursing practice. On the other hand, I was disappointed with doing inventory control, and dealing with uncooperative staffs.
Thank to UCSI University providing equal remunerations for local and expatriate staff, I had opportunity to attend numbers of workshops, seminars and conferences conducted within and outside university campus. Yet this kind support has been the required nutrition for my personal growth and development so that I could build up some level of confidence and new outlook to go further ahead. At the same time, I evaluated myself that I needed further advanced education, and I wanted to have quality education to upgrade my knowledge and experience. I had strong desire to study in University of Malaya, which is the best place for me to get quality education with affordable cost of study.  Since I was not allowed to study part-time by head of department, I decided to stop working and enrolled in Master of Nursing Science course at University of Malaya, Kuala Lumpur.

3.      Planning for future professional journey
I am highly satisfied with studying master degree in nursing, and I feel that satisfaction foster me to have a clear vision for development of the entire nursing professional especially in Myanmar. I have an intention to go back to my home country. If the situation is feasible, I intended to study doctorate degree in nursing education because I want to upgrade nursing education in Myanmar to achieve international standard.
Since professional development in nursing is very slow in Myanmar that is mainly due to suppressive control by medical profession and bureaucratic government policy, I plan to get involve in policy making related to nursing education, setting rules and regulations in Myanmar Nurses and Midwifes Council, and strengthening Myanmar Nurses Association. As I have learned from my experiences, nurses need to get recognition, satisfaction and empowerment so that they will grow as highly contributive individuals for the community. Self- determination theory stated that psychological need satisfaction is importantly influenced by the interpersonal and organizational contexts that people encounter. Therefore, it is important to reform the regulatory body and systems for nurses to promote satisfaction, and thus, develop full confidence to take the leadership role in health care delivery.
I believe that writing articles in local or international newsletters, journals or magazines is one strategy for nurses to get involve in political issues; by this way nurses will be well-recognized and highly visible among the public, and nurse will posses some power, authority and autonomy to change the entire nursing profession and discipline. With this belief, I have taken up writing career and contributed some articles to one of Myanmar magazines. I am now preparing to write academic article in English to become influential author. Thanks to the compulsory assignments required to fulfil completion of my course, I have acquired the practice to read a lot and write up which I love to do.
Self-determination theorist asserted that intrinsic goals such as intimate relationships, personal growth, or contributing to one’s community are conducive to need satisfaction, and therefore facilitate health and wellness. A research study showed that extrinsic goal framing undermined self-reported task enjoyment and personal valuation of the activity and forestalled the individuals’ conceptual performance and persistence (Vansteenkiste, Timmermans, Lens, Soenen, & Broeck, 2008). This finding replicated the previous studies shown that the experimental induction of intrinsic goals promotes better conceptual learning and persistence compared to the induction of extrinsic goals (Vansteenkiste et al., 2008).
Vansteenkiste et al. (2008) also reasoned that inducing the extrinsic goals such as wealth, physical appeals and social recognition creates an outward orientation by drawing individual attention toward external signs of worth. This attention shift precludes the possibility of task-absorbed engagement in the activity, so that the individuals fail to enjoy the learning activity and perform less well. Extrinsic goal framing prompts some motivated learning which approached in rigid and narrowed-minded fashion which promotes memorization of learning material but interferes with an in-depth processing of the contents.
Rationally I agree with the statement that intrinsic goals facilitate psychological well-being because they provide direct satisfaction of the basic psychological needs. Highly I appreciate and value on intrinsic motivation, engaging in an activity for its own sake, simply because it is enjoyable. With this value, I will move forward to empower the nurses through intrinsic motivation and intrinsic goal framing leading to improve quality nursing care, thereby  increasing healthy and productive human resources.

4.      Conclusion
Development of reflective practice is central to nursing education and clinical academic career in nursing. Freshwater, et al., (2008) supposed that the notion of specialist knowledge should be defined by the individual and the reflective development and application of theory and research within it, rather than medical specialty. They added that individual nurse practitioners should be open to examine and evaluate different theoretical and analytic perspectives using critical reflection on their own practice-based knowledge and pattern of knowing (cited from Carper, 1987; White, 1995). Writing professional journal using theoretical framework in is an effective way to enhance critical reflection.


5.      Reference:
 Freshwater, D., & Esterbuizen, P. (2008). Reflective narrative: developing a career pathway. In D. Freshwater, B. J. Taylor, & G. Sherwood (Eds.), International Textbook of reflective Practice in Nursing (pp.223-234). United Kingdom, Oxford: Blackwell publishing, Honor Society of Nursing.
Riley-Doucet, C., & Wilson, S. (1997). A three step method of self-reflection using reflective journal writing. Journal of Advanced Nursing, 27(5). Retrieved from http://eproxy.um.edu.my
Ryan, R. (2009). Self- determination theory and wellbeing. WeD Research Review 1. Welbeing in developing country (WeD), Center for Development Studies, Unversity of Bath. Retrieved from http://www.welldev.org.uk
Self-Determination Theory: An approach to human motivation & personality (2012). Retrieved on 8 March, 2012, from http://www.selfdeterminationtheory.org
Vansteenkiste, M., Timmermans, T.,  Lens, W.,  Soenen, B., & Broeck, A. V. ( 2008). Does Extrinsic Goal Framing Enhance Extrinsic Goal-Oriented Individuals’ Learning and Performance? An Experimental Test of the Match Perspective Versus Self-Determination Theory. Journal of Educational Psychology. 100(2), 387-397. Retrieve from http://www.selfdeterminationtheory.org

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